Whiney Rapist

Over the course of this NBA season, no one has complained and whined more than Kobe Bryant. Currently, Kobe sits at 15 technical fouls on the season, one away from an automatic one-game suspension. He is leading the NBA, beating the annual leader, Rasheed Wallace. I understand basketball is a competitive sport and emotions can occasionally take over, but Kobe, along with the whole Lakers team, have been complaining an extraordinary amount. You can't leave out Phil Jackson, who has also received technical fouls over the season. During a recent game, Kobe received a technical for complaining about a foul when they were beating the lowly Sonics by over 30. Although I despise Kobe, many people look up to him and use him as a role model. Complaining because you don't get your way is not a good thing to teach to people, but Kobe has too big of an ego to realize this. He relies too much on receiving every single call because he's a superstar. But the problems with refereeing in the NBA is a whole other can of worms.

Cubbies Team to Beat!

100 years is a long time.
This is not the first, and definitely not the last time the baseball world will hear about the Cubs infertility, the greatest in sports history. I think of myself as a pretty realistic Cubs fan (I will mention Cale's post later), so I am confidently, and without cliche, saying that this is the Cubs' year. For the first time as a Cubs fan, I was satisfied with the offseason activity, even more so than getting Soriano the year before. This year, Jim Hendry tried to improve our power and run support with Fukudome, but also tried to improve our pitching for the first time in a while by getting Lieber and keeping the previous year's pitchers. I am happy to say that Mark Prior has finally been traded, but Kerry Wood is still pitching as a closer (he gave up 3 runs in the opener!) Pinella has many options for the lineup, rotation, and bullpen this year, probably the first time the Cubs had this many options since 2003. The pieces are all in place for a World Series run, especially with the Central being relatively down this season (90 games should easily win this division). So as I have before, I will raise my expectations and spend countless hours of watching and waiting in hopes that the Cubs can finally give back to the city of Chicago (the White Sox win doesn't count because, come on, it's the White Sox).

As for Cale's post. Alou has admitted this before and it was a long time ago, but I admit, too many Cubs fans look past Gonzalez's unbelievable error to blame a fan. I guess being illogical and unreasonable comes with being broken-hearted during the Cubs best chance for a World Series berth in over 50 years! I, on the other hand, will be realistic and look to the future...

Davidson Disappoints

Alliteration  aside, what was the Davidson coaching staff thinking in their failed attempt to take out Kansas?

Clearly Stephan Curry has the ability to win that game.  And could have.  But you've got a kid (Bryant Barr) who also was shooting lights out at the end of the game.  You know KU is locking up against Curry, why they didn't make a play to Barr is beyond me.  

I know I should support the Big XII and I normally do, but I just wanted to see this Davidson team move on.  One, because it can't hurt my joke of a bracket.  And two, it is fun.  Davidson did all the right things to win that game.  They played tough against a bigger and by all measures, a better team.  But the end of the game was baffling.  

Also - stay tuned this weekend for MLB predictions 

The Truth

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=3324343

It appears Moises Alou finally took a step back from the situation back in 2003 to truly understand the reality of what happened.  Steve Bartmen clearly did what any true baseball fan would have done in that situation.  He tried to catch a ball that Mr. Alou wouldn't catch.  I'm sorry Cubs fan (I'm not but for the sake of civility) but thats the true.  Now Alou admits it.  The Cubs just were not the better team.  And it showed later as Alex Gonzales botched a sure double play.  

Nobody blames him, but truly he cost the Cubs the game.  Why can't a logical and reasonable fan see that? 

I think I just summed up Cubs fans pretty nicely right there.  

Tourney Challenge: Week 2

The Final Four is set and only one bracket was bold enough to predict a historic 4-for-4 by the 1-seeds. Three of the four were absolutely dominant in their Elite Eight matches, with Kansas barely slipping by an inspired Davidson team. (Speaking of which, did anyone notice how Stephon Curry's dismal performance in the second half went completely without comment? I mean, the guy has been stellar, no doubt about it, but 25 points after taking 25 shots? I counted a stretch where he missed seven in a row, mostly being ill-advised treys in which he shot 4-16. I honestly think the hype may have gone to his head and Davidson could have won this game if he had focused more on playmaking than scoring. Besides, the analysts forget that the reason he was so successful in the first couple rounds was because nobody really knew of him; once he actually garnered some attention he wasn't very effective. Ok ok, I'll lay off the guy now...)

With a chalkboard Final Four, most of us have been left in the dust. However, there are many scenarios that can still play out. Some stats after the second week of action:

-Gou Nu De's and Kassel 1 have no points possible remaining.
-Five brackets are tied with the most points possible remaining with 400.
-The Jaundice Eye was the only bracket aside from Top Seeds to get the Final Four.
-The top five brackets can all win under the right circumstances.

Here are the current standings:

1) Top Seeds, 980
2) The Jaundice Eye, 970
3) Deni's Domination, 920
4) Hands Off Raiders, 860
5) Trader Vic, 840
6) George Fox, 750
7) 40 oz In A Closet, 680
7) Beyer, 680
9) Gou Nu De's, 630
10) Ted Casady, 580*
11) Kassel 1, 530

*Theo didn't submit a bracket on ESPN.com in time but he did email it to me before the tournament started. He has 120 PPR with Kansas losing in the championship.

Opening Day!

Today is one of the greatest days of the year.

Today is Opening Day.*


*If you didn't know that, you're reading the wrong blog.

Iraqi Soccer Team Wins Important Match

Here's the closest thing to a sportsy post I can come up with:

There's a new ad featuring the Iraq National Soccer Team on the Arabic television news channels, where the club plays a match with rifle-wielding terrorists to determine the fate of the country (hint: the terrorists lose). It starts out with "On a dark day, the terrorists wanted to conquer Iraq" and ends with the goalie disposing of a live grenade with a lucky kick.

The ad, the newest and least graphic installment of a gruesome campaign denouncing terrorism, is aimed at reinforcing the concept in the Arab world that everyone plays a part in stamping out terrorism. But, like the USPS commercials (who sends more letters because they see television ads?), I think TV commercials are a silly medium to influence the deep-seated, complex loyalties of citizens towards either fledgling governments or jihadist operations. But, it's good to see some levity and humor in the discussion, the concept of a soccer team facing with armed terrorists is outrageous prima facie. I'm willing to bet it's our tax dollars at work!

If you just want a funny video about Arabs, check out New Iraqi Law Requires Waiting Period For Suicide Vest Purchases

Japan's National Pastime

It should be noted that it is rare that I would every tend to agree with Jay Mariotti, but for once the guy is right.

http://www.suntimes.com/sports/mariotti/861073,mariotti032608.article

I was eating out last night and watching sportscenter as it covered the Boston - Oakland game.  I have to be very honest, I did not know that it was opening day.  I'm ashamed as a baseball fan to admit that, but the bigger question is, why was it in Japan when most of America slept?  Why is the national pastime of this great nation being relegated to Japan to kick of the season?

Why?  The White Sox are still in camp in Arizona as are most of the teams.  I'm certain they're not gaining any advantage at this point by playing a few games early.  (By the way, they come back to the states to play a couple exhibition games before they resume their season)  But to ends does having opening day in Japan serve. 

This is not some xenophobic remark about Japanese people or their culture.  Rather, why is something so instilled in America culture and a tradition we can truly call unique to America, being transferred to Japan.  

It seems ridiculous to me and as Jay pointed out, is another blemish on the terrible record of Bud Selig.  A tie game in the All-Star game?  Steroids?  Luxury Tax?  What gives Bud?

Don't sell out our pastime.  Devoted fans and teams and players deserve better than this.  I hope this is a one time thing and we see a move back to state-side opening day.  

Maybe I'm just bitter because my bracket sucks...

Tourney Challenge: Week 1

After the first week of March Madness, the goddam 'Top Seeds' chalkboard bracket has taken the lead. All in all, the first round had plenty of exciting games. (I hated seeing Drake lose, but what a finish!) Oh, and beware of the twelve seeds...

Some noteworthy stats:

-The Jaundice Eye won the first round with 25/32.
-Deni's Domination and Trader Vic won the second round with 11/16.
-George Fox placed last in both rounds.
-Deni's Domination has the most points possible remaining (1000).
-Gou Nu De's and Kassel 1 have the least points possible remaining (760).
-The only brackets that picked one of the double-digit teams in the Sweet 16 are George Fox (Villanova) and 40 oz in a Closet (Western Kentucky).
-Every bracket had Duke in the Elite Eight.
-None of the brackets has UNC -- the #1 ranked team in both polls -- winning the tournament.
-Deni's Domination is the only bracket with 7/8 Elite Eight teams still remaining.
-Kassel 1 is the only bracket with two of its Final Four eliminated. (Both Beyer and Gou Nu De's have one eliminated.)

The standings:

1) Top Seeds, 460
2) The Jaundice Eye, 450
3) Deni's Domination, 440
3) Beyer, 440
5) Hands Off Raiders, 420
6) Trader Vic, 400
6) 40 oz in a Closet, 400
8) Gou Nu De's, 390
9) Kassel 1, 370
10) George Fox, 310

Woes in Chicago

This season the Chicago Bulls have been full of discontent and unaccomplished expectations. The "Also See" section of the Bulls' ESPN.com homepage -- a list of recent news reports concerning the team -- is comprised of the following articles:

• Nocioni apologizes to Boylan, team for outburst during loss to Pacers
• Bulls discipline Duhon over comments on benching
• Bulls' Thomas mum on reason for missing practice
• Bulls suspend Thomas for unexcused absence
• Bulls get angry: Noah has words with Wallace
• Bulls' Noah benched extra game by teammates

I miss the days when the only distraction was Dennis Rodman in a wedding dress. It's not easy being a Bulls fan these days...

Drake's Clock Strikes Midnight

For those that did not see the heartbreaking end to Drake's tremendous season, you missed out on a heck of a show.  Drake struggled mightily to contain the hot shooting Hill-toppers of Western Kentucky.  The simply shot lights out and scored at will against a Drake defense that seemed a bit slower and less athletic that Western Kentucky.  Surprisingly, the biggest advantage to the Hill-toppers was foul trouble.  With their best big man out, they had a smaller line-up on the floor and played a lot better with that.  But give credit to Drake.  They were down 16 at one point and you saw a little panic (Korver's three point shoots from way down town) but by a large they knew they could claw back, and they did.  Western Kentucky fouled a lot, and early in both halves putting Drake in the double bonus early on.  Bad choice because is money from the charity stripe.   Bottom line was the game was a fantastic show of basketball, in a truly pure form.  Viewers saw players major programs passed up and proved their worth.  Keno Davis should continue to make Drake a respectable program with more talent.  But what we watched this season with Drake was a lot of fun.  

The Streak Ends!

I don't know about everyone else, but I was extremely disappointed to see the Rockets streak come to an end. The NBA needs all the excitement it can get, and the streak was a great way to get people fired up and anxious for the playoffs. I am usually a bigger fan of the Eastern Conference, but since the Bulls can't string together more than two wins and the top two teams are way above the rest of the conference, the race in the Western Conference is far more exciting. I can't remember the last time all 8 playoff teams were only separated by 4.5 games this late in the season. It's crazy that winning 3 games can put you at the top of the conference and losing 3 can take you out of the playoffs completely! Every playoff match-up in the West should be full of action, so I hope I am left satisfied by season's end, especially if the Lakers drop out of the playoffs.

It's March MADness, baby!

Well, kids, it's that time of year again...

And it's about time. Even though I've been overseas, the few games I've caught have fired me up for the greatest event in the sporting universe. Did anyone catch the end of that Minnesota-Indiana Big Ten tourney game? If that doesn't get you ready for the Madness, I don't know what will.

Create an entry at espn.com and submit your official bracket to the group "ISU FH '08" (password: gulk). For last year's results, including Sport's second win in a row, click here. Who can dethrone him? Who can beat the chalkboard bracket? Will Seth and I again lose to 90+% of the brackets? Don't count on it -- I got yer winner right here...

My New Inspiration

Buster Martin is about to become the oldest person to run a marathon...at 101 years old. He still works a job, frequents a gym, smokes, drinks, his bones are 25% dust, and I bet he's still healthier than you. Two weeks ago he ran a 13-mile half marathon, claiming he could have done it faster if he hadn't stopped for a beer and cigarette. Evidently Buster's a stud off the beaten path as well, having fathered 17 kids. Quote of the day:

"Martin likes running, 'but not as much as I like my beer,' he added."

Gents, this is the man we should all strive to be...

Eliot Spitzer Contends for Biggest American Hypocrite

The Governor of New York has dramatically entered the pitched battle for biggest hypocrite in America with his admission of being a regular john for high-end prosties.

Clearly Eliot Spitzer represents the very worst of the do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do nature of politics. While he was busy making up crimes to further his career, he was personally arranging meetings with $5000/hour call girls.

He invented new legal maneuvers to indict Wall Street bankers, greatly inflating the power of the state attorney general (the herd arguing Bush orchestrated has overstepped his powers wouldn’t have a vocabulary to describe the NY AG racket). He also used his office to wage personal battles against foes like Dick Grasso, chair of the NYSE, for too high a salary. As with many Spitzer cases, there was no evidence to support the charges and the motive was good PR, all criminal charges were dropped.

His conceit extended to other arenas. Like any Democrat official, he knew he was smarter than everyone else and therefore entitled to make decisions for everyone else. From an October 2004 interview with the Atlantic (linked by NRO):

By 2004, Spitzer was deep into his campaign to clean up Wall Street, and some critics on the right had accused him of going beyond law enforcement to a point where he was effectively creating new regulation through the threat of litigation. In a profile in The Atlantic, Spitzer dismissed these critics: “They reflexively evoke the words ‘free market’ without an understanding of what the term means. I believe in the market as much as anybody, but I believe I understand it better than they do. I understand that a market needs to have rules by which it lives.” Spitzer’s comment missed the point of much of the criticism — that as a state attorney general, he was not the person who should be making the rules.

I personally am all for legalized prostitution, legalized drugs, and legalized (insert victimless crime here). If most drugs were legal tomorrow, I’d wait in a decent-sized line to buy a few joints. (But they’re not legal, and that absurd fact has prevented me from taking any pleasure from THC. Sad but true.)

What I can’t accept is that hypocrisy in public officials. If it’s good for you, why are you special? Why did you, Mr. Spitzer, put other people in jail for what you enjoy, too? We all realize that one man can’t change laws by himself, but speaking out on these fucking ridiculous laws would be a good place to start. Not only has Gov. Spitzer taken an oath to uphold the laws as they stand, he has zealously prosecuted the statutes he was flouting. Ethically, he was opening himself to dangerous blackmail scenarios and, legally, he was breaking federal banking laws.

And worst, now this maggot (no offense to any shit-eating insects) is refusing to submit his resignation because to do so would ‘give up his biggest bargaining chip’; he will make a plea agreement where relinquishing his throne is the punishment for the federal charges he faces. What an absolute scumbag! I honestly hope the federal attorneys turn down any offer of using a tarnished elected position as leverage, the Assembly moves on with impeachment, and the man is sentenced after a very public trial. What a Democrat!

College Football Coaching Changes

I'll admit this post is a little tardy, but the dust certainly has settled by now in the world of college football head coaching.  (Unless Bobby Petrino found a better job...)

Nebraska

The hire that should have been is finally.  Bo Pelini represents an old school mentality in football.  He was a great defensive coordinator for LSU, Oklahoma, Nebraska, and the NFL (he was also a grad. assistant at Iowa) he will get a chance to show if he's head coaching material.  My guess, oh yeah.  Bo will find his calling in Nebraska where football is all they have.  Bill Callahan never embraced that as a head coach.  However, it will be a challenge for Nebraska to regain its swager.  Their defense was awful last year (see Ball State - 600 yards)  They continue to bring in talent, but what remains to be seen is if this talent will mature into playmakers.  I imagine this will take 2 years to get the program back to top of the Big 12 but I'm not convinced Nebraska can ever be a major player in the BCS anymore.  The talent disparity is much closer now with Missouri and Kansas both rising in ability, Colorado is poised for a break out year, and ISU isn't a pushover either.  I imagine though, people will be patient with Pelini for a few years, but if major improvements aren't in place in 3 years, expect another coup.

Grade: B+

Texas A&M

Mike Sherman brings his NFL know-how to College Station.  (No word how much it costs to subscribe to his newsletter)  I see this hire going well for a while and then falling flat.  I just don't know if NFL coaches are a good fit in college.  (I know for a fact college coaches should stay away from the NFL)  They tend to bring a different attitude to the game that just doesn't always fit.  College Station has an awesome stadium and the University has a ton of pride.  Who knows how long Sherman will stay.  How will the players respond?  Does his fit the A&M mold?  I just don't know and for that, don't really like this hire.  He seemed like the quick answer to keep the recruits for the fall, which is not always a good solution (see Wayne Morgan).  A&M should have spent sometime to find a better replacement who understand college football (see Will Muschamp - Texas Def. Coordinator).

Grade: D+

UCLA

Not only do the get a head coach with some great ability but they picked up a great offensive coordinator.  Norm Chow may be the best pick up as far as assistant coaches go, with Texas hiring Will Muschamp a close 2nd.  Chow is a tremendous off. coordinator.  Look what he did at USC and I think his work in the NFL should be commended considering Vince Young was about his only weapon.  They were not respectable and given more time (and talent) he would have been successful.  Rick Neuheisel should be a good head coach with his experience.  Trouble is that he doesn't like following NCAA rules some times.  Regardless the guy is a winner and UCLA will rise towards the top and be very competitive with USC.  Can it really be that hard to get talent to Southern California?  Honestly, the talent will come and look for UCLA to be excellent in the next 2-3 years.  

Grade: A- 

Arkansas

I would never in a million years hire Bobby Petrino to coach my team.  The man has one foot out the door most of the time.  He left a Louisville program poised to get better make a run at the national title in 2007 and left a suffering Atlanta gig with 3 games left.  If he's successful at AR, I don't expect him to stay long.  Can the guy coach, oh yeah, no doubt.   But for the long term success of the program, this was a bad hire.  AR could you some stability considering how Houston Nutt was treated but the fan base is not exactly very forgiving either.  I see this hire ending in an awful blood bath (hopefully figuratively)

Grade: D

Michigan

I loved what Rich Rodriguez did with the WVU program.  However, having actually been to Morgantown, I can't say I blame the guy for leaving.  The stadium in an moderate upgrade from Jack Trice and the town leaves something to be desired.  So now he gets a program committed to winning, with the tradition (and money) to make it happen.  However, this will not be a quick turnaround.  Pat White made Rich look very smart and right now no such QB is attending Michigan.  So it might be 3-4 years until his system really begins to blossom.  Can Michigan fans be that patient.  We'll see, but trust me, the man can coach and get the job done.

Grade: A

WVU

Feel good stories only last so long.  Cinderalla was wonderful but we don't care how many kids she had with Prince Charming.  George Mason was great 2 years ago, but how did they do last year?  Norm Stewart did wonders against Oklahoma (who by the way should try bowl games before the New Year sometime, just to see if it changes matters) However, one game should not decide a season or a head coach.  Such impulse hires only lead to trouble and disappointment.  Norm Stewart bought his time and shined when it mattered.  But I don't seem him recruiting well in the future, nor being able to take this program to a national championship.  AD's need to think long term and this decision was made on a whim and 2 martinis into the night.  WVU will regret this hire.

All the sudden Rutgers looks like the best Big East team.

Grade: F

SMU

June Jones has done more with less than any coach every in the history of the world.  Maybe a bit of a stretch, but he peaked at Hawaii this last year.  The ceiling was hit and unless the AD was willing to pump some more money into a pathetic program, he could only do so much.  So I don't blame the guy for leaving and taking a job with a ton of potential.  SMU used to be a powerhouse until they (like Neuheisel) couldn't follow rules very well.  But he's in Texas, and talent will no longer be a problem.  Will the be consistent BCS teams, unlikely.  But this team will improve greatly and June Jones can finally have a decent office.

Grade: B

One coach to watch for next year to make a jump to a better program

Brian Kelly (Cincinnati) - this guy just wins and made Cincy a good program in one year, look for this to continue and him to coaching a bigger school soon.

NFL Draft

One of my favorite times of year is the NFL draft.  Maybe because I find myself starved for football come April, and its about as close as I can get.  

 

So here are my thoughts on some of the players in the draft. 

 

Brian Brohm

 

Brohm is my  favorite player in the draft.  I love his throwing motion and this ability to manage a game.  He showed his ability last year to be a great QB and had he left, would be make some noise on an NFL roster.  As it was, he stayed and suffered.  Steve Kragthorpe could not get his team to stop anybody on defense.  Sadly his stock has fallen.  However, this may be the best scenario.  I hate seeing great players going to teams that are just awful and expect one player to fix a broken franchise.  I hope the Vikes take a chance on this young man, because T. Jackson is not proving to be very helpful.  Watch this young man, because he may end up in the second round and make some team very happy (see Ben Roethlisberger)

 

Glenn Dorsey

 

I am not convinced this guy will make it in the NFL.  He's been hurt a lot, and nerved really lived up to the hype his senior year.  His stock is falling right now because of his injuries.  He might be a decent player but I don't seem him making it farther than tops on his team.  I just don't see him being an all-star nor I imagine him being a center-piece on a defensive front.  He'll contribute, but not like the Williams boys (no relation) in Minnesota.

 

Darren McFadden

 

I worry this guy might disappoint too.  He seems to be labeled as a god among men.  He isn't though.  He's good, really good.  But remember the A. Peterson was not expected to produce much in the NFL (injury prone).  However, he made it and showed his worth.  Now I do believe he can make it this league, but I'm not convinced he can produce at the same level as Adrian Peterson.  

ISU Basketball

After watching a lot of ISU basketball this year, more than I did even as an ISU student, I learned something great today.  This team is ready to shine.

Iowa State took on a team with some great players (see M. Beasley and B. Walker) and stood tough.  The Clones may not have the depth and talent of most teams, or any team for that matter.  But Coach McDermott finds a way to his players into position and you can just see that the foundation is set for success.  I realize coming from a  guy who couldn't make a shot if his life depended on it.  However, I see a huge difference between this team and the Wayne Morgan team.  Watching those games left you wondering "what the heck is going on?"  When things got bad and their athletic ability (which was at a higher level under Morgan) couldn't carry them, things fell apart.  

Now I see a team that shouldn't keep with a KSU team loaded with talent, and there was no quit.  None, at all.  They fought back from 8 and 14 point deficits to keep the game close to the very end.  

So Cyclone fans, rejoice, the future is bright.  Basketball, (and football) is on the way up in Ames.  Jamie Pollard has a plan and the men in charge are poised to led the resurgence of ISU sports.  

The best news of the day, we're still not the Hawkeyes.

14 Arrests since April 2007 = Class Program

Countdown Til 1st Pitch...

...24 days, 13 hours, 56 minutes, 25 seconds and counting...

Dallas-Area Suicide Hotline Operators Get Their Popcorn Ready

The Onion ran this after Dallas lost in the playoffs.

Hilarious.

NBA All-star Game Recap

I understand why people don't watch the NBA and the All-Star game must be a joke within a joke of a basketball game, but this year it was actually a pretty good game. It was competitive down the stretch and I always enjoy seeing the East win amid a season of Western dominance.
The entertaining finish, however, was highlighted by Ray Allen. After three quarters of messing around and the East building a lead, the west went on a run and closed the gap, taking their first lead with a few minutes remaining. It appeared the West was about to break it open, but instead it was Allen who went off. He hit three consecutive treys and made free throws to seal it (14 points in the final 3:15). (It was especially spectacular knowing he wasn't even supposed to be there, having been a last-minute replacement for an injured Caron Butler.) That kind of performance makes me a believer in Boston as a legitimate title contender. Unfortunately, the MVP award was in the hands of the public voters and the masses thought Lebron James deserved it because he was the statistical leader. Since the all-star game is usually a game of dunking and traveling, I hadn't seen a shooting display like that since the clinic Glen Rice put on in 1997. What can I say...Ray got screwed.

Trade Evaluations

Atlanta Hawks/Mike Bibby -- On paper, Atlanta looks like a contender for the East, but they don't play up to potential. The addition of Bibby provides a more reliable shooter, along with another option come the end of games. However, they already had this in Joe Johnson. The better option would have been to go after a big man.

Grade: C

Dallas Mavericks/Jason Kidd -- This is a great move. Dirk wants to play with Jason. Jason wants to play with Dirk. Devin Harris was a good point guard, but the Mavs are near the bottom of the league in assists per game. Kidd will open the floor and push the ball a bit more, reverting back to a style circa the 2003 Dallas Mavs. The only downside with Kidd is his age, but he has a few good seasons left in the tank. Expect Dallas in the Western Conference Finals.

Grade: A

LA Lakers/Pau Gasol -- I'm not quite sold on Gasol. After two years of Pau-to-Chicago rumors, I never saw him as an instant impact player. He's a decent power forward with a nice touch, but he doesn't board as well as he should. The main reason for giving props to LA on this one is because he came at a steal. With Kwame Brown (arguably) the biggest peice the Lakers had to lose, Gasol came cheap. Count on them finishing the season strong only to fade in the playoffs without any legit role players.

Grade: B+

Phoenix Suns/Shaquille O'Neal -- Oh Steve Kerr, what are you thinking? The Suns' identity is running and gunning...and the closest The Deisel gets is running near empty. I know Phoenix needed more size to bang with the big boys in the Western Conference, but are they really going to pull the reigns on Steve Nash and make him wait for Shaq to drag up and down the court? (And yes, that was a pun referencing the fact Nash has a horse face.) They would have been better off giving this team one more shot and then getting something better (and younger) for Marion in the offseason. They've pretty much decided on a win now attitude as I'd give Shaq this season and next before he's done. This will only work if it changes the lockerroom attitude drastically. Would you rather have a healthy, younger Marion every game or an aged, injury-riddled Shaq for half the games? Who knows, maybe Kerr will turn out to be a genious and I will punish myself for having ever doubted him.

Grade: C-

Miami Grade: B

U.S. Sports Across The Globe

For those who aren't aware, I am taking a training course in Abu Dhabi, UAE for one month. It is an incredible area, with Dubai rapidly becoming the most impressive city in the world. But the most shocking thing I've seen came about after turning on the television and finding myself staring at the Memphis-Tennessee basketball game. Sure it was a replay, but the fact that the Arabian version of ESPN showed the #1 vs. #2 in American collegiate sports again could be considered fairly significant. At first I assumed the channel existed purely for foreign tourists, but then I rememebered that not many Americans come to this training facility, not to mention the facilty in France I had previously stayed at didn't televise a single U.S. sporting event in two months. Eh, I'm probably giving U.S. athletics more credit than it deserves; I'm sure 97% of the people here don't give a damn whether or not Roger Clemens really took steroids...

But when it comes to the NBA, the world pays attention. (And coincidentally, most of America doesn't.) Before my trip here I spent two weeks in China on vacation. Yao Ming and Yi Jianlian are everywhere. Integrating a couple key Chinese players into the NBA has to be the best thing to ever happen to that league. I was amazed at how many games are televised around the clock in China. At a Japanese restaurant, the owner commented on how Garnett was the top vote getter for the all-star game. While I was there I had the privelage of watching the "Chinese Superbowl" as Yao's Rockets played Yi's Bucks. It was available in every household with a tv. And then two days later was the American Superbowl, which was not televised.

I heard the Giants won. Good for them...

Vote for Cy! (Again!)

Most of you already know that Cy has been named "the most dominant mascot on Earth" mostly due to the loyal support of Cyclone fans with nothing better to do than vote online a million and a half times for Cy. Well, for those of you that got a kick out of it you get the chance to do it again.

NCAA Football 2009 for the Wii, PS3, and Xbox 360 is having an online poll to pick a mascot for the cover. You should all vote for Cy! (Unfortunately you can only vote once a day. Don't forget!)

To cheer or not to cheer, that is the question...

Cyclone Alley has gotten some bad press lately, most recently through SI as a direct result of everyone's favorite campus newspaper, the ISU Daily. Suffice it to say that the students at Iowa State basketball games have around 2,500 seats, of which over 900 have sat empty for every game yet this season. The athletic department may be right to threaten to sell them to alumni instead, and Jamie Pollard has decided to throw the issue out as red meat for students to devour. Already the original article has spawned a number of "don't threaten the students" letters to the editor (and who hasn't written an angry letter to the editor of the ISU Daily? Ok, maybe I have written over my fair share.)

The gist of the situation is whether or not the students should be limited to only sitting at each end of the court below the balcony, and whether or not our little student section is about to become exclusive (with less than 10% of the student population able to buy tickets.) It looks like the students need to start showing up...

80% Healthy?!

Athletes recovering from injury are often self-proclaimed (or proclaimed by trainers or coaches) as X% healthy. What exactly does that mean?

In ESPN’s day two coverage of the NFL draft, Sao Paolantonio reported that a member of the Dolphins organization proclaimed Ted Ginn as 75-80%, but then said he would be unable to participate in next week’s spring practice, and would likely wear an ankle-protecting boot for at least 6 more weeks.

So, what’s 0%?...dead? Or maybe being dead can get as high as a 40%, so long as your bones and muscles are still intact, reserving a 0% for someone who is dead, cremated, sprinkled overboard across the Pacific, and ingested by plankton?

Seriously, you’re not 80% healthy (regarding one’s ability to play professional football), if you can’t play football!

In my opinion, an athlete whose injury prevents him from being able to play should be rated as 0% (or simply “injured”), and a 100% healthy rating should be given to someone who is unaffected by injury.

I’m reminded of Tom Barnsten’s infamous 8 out of 10 rating of The Incredible Hulk movie, which makes me assume that his scale would reserve a 0 out of 10 rating for burning in the fires of Hell for eternity.

I'm Already Losing Interest

Isn't part of playing on the road the requirement to stay in hotels, practice at the opponent's facility, and be away from home? The NBA playoffs are already feeling drug out after there were three days between the first two games of the Bulls-Heat first-round series. After Saturday's afternoon game the Heat hopped a plane to fly back to Miami--because they wanted to practice at their own facility and sleep in their own beds--and returned Tuesday in time for Game 2 in Chicago. Ridiculous. The NBA claims they need at least a couple days between games when they relocate cities so this situation has no excuse (as if extending the first round to best of seven wasn't bad enough). And they wonder why people gradually stop caring about the NBA playoffs...

(This kind of weak-ass schedule just reinforces my growing belief that baseball truly is a superior sport.)

MLB Predictions

(It may be a couple weeks late, but here are my final standing predictions as decided before the season started.)

AL East
1. Yankees--lineup is simply too solid to bet against.
2. Red Sox--pitching will carry them while Dice-K won't be best starter
3. Blue Jays--the dark horse I always pull for in this division has to settle for 3rd
4. Devil Rays--as Lou Brown would say, "there may be a couple future all-stars in there"
5. Orioles--this team needs to make a move or two to even be legit

AL Central
1. White Sox--rockstar rotation returns to form after off year while A.J. and Co. find a way to return to playoffs
2. Indians--after two straight years of barely missing the cut they miss it again and lose WC to Boston
3. Twins--barely edge Detroit because of Santana's 20+ wins...again,
4. Tigers--a bold pick to bet against young Tigers, I just don't see a repeat season
5. Royals--sadly enough, stuck in cellar again because Central is just too damn good

AL West
1. Angels--they win division only because someone has to
2. Athletics--they place second in the division only because someone has to
3. Rangers--Sammy "Corky" Sosa gets to 600 as highlight of season
4. Mariners--I say good riddance to Jeff Weaver as he struggles without the magic touch of Dave Duncan

NL East
1. Mets--hate to say it, but a new powerhouse in National League will emerge with Reyes/Beltran putting up MVP numbers
2. Braves--will come in a very close second as Braves bounce back to claim WC
3. Phillies--Ryan Howard proves to be a fluke (a la Adrien Beltre) as Chase Utley doesn't live up to guady contract
4. Marlins--very young team will show improvement but not make playoffs for another year or two
5. Nationals--see Orioles above

NL Central
1. Cardinals--defending champs' shaky pitching backed by lineup of usual suspects while Pujols does business as always
2. Brewers--pitching rotation rebounds from injury, Brew Crew youngsters mature, and Italian Sausage wins race
3. Cubs--good offseason moves (Lilly+Floyd) only take Cubbies so far if franchise hopes still hang on two lost causes (Wood+Prior)
4. Reds--Griffey has good year but Arroyo and Harang remain question marks
5. Pirates--Bucs avoid cellar again...barely
6. Astros--quite a load placed on Oswalt's shoulders as aging team waits out Biggio's 3000th hit and Clemens' decision (to sign elsewhere)

NL West
1. Dodgers--this rotation will make claim as best in baseball even without Maddux
2. Diamondbacks--return of Randy Johnson results in more wins
3. Padres--anyone think Maddux will retire a Pad?
4. Rockies--the Blue Jays of the National League, a team I always cheer on for some odd reason
5. Giants--lost Schmidt, gave all their money to Zito, and franchise still revolves around Barroid Bonds--could be a long season for bay area fans

And my go-out-on-a-limb awards:

AL MVP: Jim Thome--in my opinion, one of the great hitters in the game today, will take ChiSox back to ALCS
NL MVP: Carlos Beltran--will become more consistant and thrive off having good hitters around him
AL Cy Young: Johan Santana--OK, not really going out on a limb, but until he shows otherwise, he may be the best pitcher in baseball
NL Cy Young: Roy Oswalt--repeats last year's good stats even on last place team and gets nod this year (apologies to my man, Carpenter)
AL Comeback Player of Year: Sammy Sosa--how's this for a ridiculous pick?
NL Comeback Player of Year: Ben Sheets--falls short of Cy Young but puts together solid/complete season

Damn, It Feels Good to be a Cyclone

After the Big Dance ended, Fox Sports released its newest collegiate basketball+football rankings. I’ve listed their rankings below, which is a ranking of a school’s combination of basketball and football programs. The rank in ( ) is last year's rank. The article can be found at http://msn.foxsports.com/cfb/story/6585188 and additionally gives their rationale for the top 25 teams.

Before I get to the list, let me just point out a few quick notes about our Cyclones:

- Of the 65 BCS Conference teams, only 3 rank worse than ISU
Baylor
Northwestern
Colorado
- Of all 119 teams, only 8 dropped from last year farther than ISU
UConn
NC State
Miami OH
Northwestern
UAB
UTEP
Colorado
LA Tech
- Finally, just take a look at some of the schools ranked higher than ISU:
29. Hawaii
49. Akron
55. Air Force
62. Tulsa
70. San Diego State
71. Fresno State
73. Toledo
75. Central Michigan
76. Western Michigan
82. Kent State (maybe I'm just ignorant, but the ONLY thing I know of Kent State is the 70's war protest/massacre)


So, here’s the list:

1. Florida (7)
2. Ohio State (2)
3. Wisconsin (8)
4. Louisville (20)
5. Texas A&M (35)
6. USC (27)
7. Texas (1)
8. BYU (50)
9. Notre Dame (22)
10. UCLA (4)
11. Virginia Tech (41)
12. Tennessee (25)
13. Maryland (44)
14. Boston College (6)
15. Kentucky (54)
16. Georgia Tech (71)
17. Oregon (53)
18. Arkansas (57)
19. Texas Tech (58)
20. Nevada (9)
21. Purdue (85)
22. West Virginia (5)
23. Michigan (16)
24. Clemson (21)
25. Oklahoma State (73)
26. Kansas (17)27. LSU (3)
28. Boise State (80)
29. Hawaii (78)30. Pittsburgh (26)
31. Washington State (93)
32. Oklahoma (10)
33. Wake Forest (75)
34. North Carolina (18)
35. Arizona (46)
36. Auburn (32)
37. Kansas State (66)
38. Alabama (12)
56. Indiana (56)
40. Virginia (33)
41. Georgia (31)
42. Michigan State (29)
43. Cal (14)
44. Florida State (19)
45. Nebraska (42)
46. Missouri (65)
47. Rutgers (43)
48. South Carolina (30)
49. Akron (36)
50. Houston (49)
51. Iowa (11)
52. Memphis (13)
53. UNLV (84)
54. Vanderbilt (60)
55. Air Force (64)
56. Illinois (51)
57. Syracuse (63)
58. Southern Miss (102)
59. Washington (55)
60. Duke (52)
61. Ohio (83)
62. Tulsa (76)
63. Oregon State (92)
64. Penn State (28)
65. TCU (98)
66. Miami (Fla.) (24)
67. South Florida (99)
68. Ole Miss (94)
69. Cincinnati (59)
70. San Diego State (61)
71. Fresno State (62)
72. Mississippi State (82)
73. Toledo (72)
74. UConn (23)
75. Central Michigan (114)
76. Western Michigan (95)
77. Arizona State (70)
78. NC State (15)
79. New Mexico State (91)
80. Minnesota (39)
81. Stanford (67)
82. Kent State (79)
83. Utah (77)
84. Iowa State (40)
85. Navy (108)
86. Utah State (69)
87. Middle Tennessee (89)
88. UCF (87)
89. Troy (110)
90. Rice (105)
91. San Jose State (116)
92. North Texas (104)
93. Wyoming (97)
94. New Mexico (74)
95. Colorado State (81)
96. Florida Atlantic (106)
97. Southern Methodist (109)
98. Miami (Ohio) (48)
99. Baylor (90)
100. Northwestern (37)
101. UL-Monroe (112)
102. UAB (47)
103. Arkansas State (101)
104. Tulane (111)
105. Marshall (103)
106. UTEP (38)
107. Colorado (34)
108. East Carolina (113)
109. Northern Illinois (68)
110. Temple (86)
111. UL-Lafayette (88)
112. Louisiana Tech (45)
113. Ball State (107)
114. Army (118)
115. Bowling Green (100)
116. Buffalo (96)
117. Idaho (119)
118. Eastern Michigan (117)
119. Florida International (115)

Maybe we should re-focus on baseball.

Oh Well, Better Luck Next Year...

Pardon the absence from the blogosphere, but I've been in Paris, France for two months with limited internet connectivity and even less awareness of the American sporting world. (Needless to say, the BBC doesn't show NCAA highlights.) Over that span I've compiled a list of posts to touch on but most are outdated and of little interest.
So I'll begin with the final standings from the "ISU FH Gulk!" NCAA Tourney Challenge and the individual ESPN percentiles. Kudos to Sport for a second consecutive victory. Kudos to Krull for picking the champ. Kudos to Seth for losing to 97.4 percent of the submitted brackets. (Is it not obvious Seth and I have been out-of-country?)

1) Port (Macaulay Gulkin) 80.0
2) Top Seeds 72.1
3) Hertel (Loosen Up Your Buttocks) 69.3
4) Zenisek (It's March Madness Baby!) 67.9
5) Krull (Brokeback Bracket) 63.5
6) Fischer (J. Voss & the SoHos) 58.9
7) Williams (Ka-Diss Mary Claire) 14.4
8) Guiter (No Means Yes) 9.8
9) Alberty (The Foreign Devil) 2.6

Baseball Begins for 2007

Well the season is well underway with many headlines making news already.

Will Bonds catch Aaron?
(I say not this year)

Is Dice-K as good as the hype?
(Only time will tell)

How good is the AL Central?
(Best in the league in a long time)

What the heck is Roger Clemens going to do?
(Come back when he feels like it)

I expect to get some predictions done here this weekend while I'm home and get back on the blogging trail here soon.

In the meantime - Go South Side!

March Madness Sugestions

The NCAA Men’s BBall Tourney is often considered one of, if not the greatest sporting event. Other contenders I would offer are: The World Cup, The Rider Cup (golf match up between USA and Europe), and any game of college football.

Between this year and last, I’ve compiled a list of ways to make March Madness even better (who am I kidding…I really just want to gripe).

Here’s what I came up with (in a countdown style):

#10a: 35 Second Shot Clock
35 seconds is just too long. 24 seconds is just too short. For god’s sake, let’s just make it 30 seconds. It’s not like 30 seconds is some obscure measure of time.

Along with this, I also like the 8 seconds backcourt violation (as opposed to 10). I don’t think I saw a game this year or last when a team was called for a backcourt time violation. And while I’m ranting, shouldn’t this backcourt violation be “timed” by the clock, rather than some ref who’s walking to one tempo, watching the ball bounce at another tempo, and is then expected to keep perfect seconds with his hand. It would be easy to have a clock and buzzer for this infraction – similar to the shot clock (or even integrated into the shot clock).

#10b: Get the Coaches Off the Court
If any part of the coach’s shoe touches the inbounds line, automatic T! This gripe actually applies to accurate officiating of all “lesser” infractions, including: a player stepping on the line when guarding the inbounds pass, stepping in the lane before ball leaves the free-throw shooter’s hands, and of course, traveling. These violations are called in elementary school…so why aren’t they called in college?

#9: The Play-in-Game
Just try to remember as many play-in-game participants as you can. Now try to remember the losers of this game.

Even if a play-in-game winner went on to beat a no.1 seed, it would do more harm than good, because the one guy who picked the perfect bracket would have had to pick “TBD” to win! How is that legit?! You don’t even know who it is you’re picking to win.

By the way, having a #10a and #10b was a joke to illustrate how stupid the play in game is.

#8: Commercials
For the most part, the commercials are tolerable…but only for the first 5 showings. CBS and her advertising affiliates need to remember that the people who watch these games typically watch a lot of them, and airing the same commercial to the same people in the double-digit qtys is probably more likely to result in product boycotts than a successful advertising campaign.

Here’s a simple rule for commercial creators: don’t air your commercial until you’ve watched it 10 times on full volume while enduring a massive hang-over.

#7: Whining about the 66th – 70th Teams that Didn’t Make the Tourney
Here’s another simple rule: before making a claim that some team was neglected by the selection committee, you must list ALL of the teams that this “deserving” team lost to.

This rule also applies to any head coach before making a statement about how stunned and disappointed he is and how he must go tell his poor players that “life just isn’t fair.” Give me a break! If you wanted to get in that bad, then you shouldn’t have lost to all of those terrible opponents! Even with a shitty season, almost all teams at least have a chance to suck it up and win 3 or 4 straight games and win their conference tourney for an automatic bid. If you can’t even do that, then get the “f” off my TV!

And ESPN (especially Dickey V) just fuel this nonsense every year! After the bracket is released on Selection Sunday, there are 32 match-ups that they could be promoting, predicting, and giving insight too…which is 20 times more interesting than hearing about some poor team that didn’t make it. So why do they spend 60% of Bracketology whining about some poor small school that will never get its chance to go and get demolished in the first round?

#6: Letting a Shot’s Outcome Determine a Foul
Whether or not a player fouls another has nothing to do with whether or not the ball goes in the basket! So why do refs consistently wait until it’s clear that the ball won’t go in before calling a foul? It is absurd. It’s always been absurd. It will always be absurd.

#5 CBS – No Sister Network(s)
ABC has ABC, ESPN, ESPN 2, ESPN U, and ESPN Classic.
FOX has FOX, FSN, and FX
NBC has NBC, USA
CBS has CBS.

If any of the other broadcasters aired the tourney, we’d either see double, triple, or all of the games.

#4 Replay monitor
OK, I’ve had enough of this…and I’m not alone here. Seeing the large asses of 3 refs as they gather around an I-pod sized monitor with stopwatches trying to determine whether the ball went out of bounds with 3.3, 3.2, 3.1, or 1.2 seconds is outrageous. There was a game this year when they didn’t even give the ball to the right team – the replay showed that the ball went off of the other guy! But there they are, taking 6 minutes of real time to try to accurately determine how much time should be “fairly” put back on the clock before they give the wrong team one more chance to win.

#3 Show All Replays of All Fouls!
Yet another simple rule: If a foul was called and the action has stopped, show the replay.

This especially applies to shooting fouls. When a player is on the line, I have next to no interest to watch him wait for the ball, watch the ref tell the players “2 shots”, watch the coach pace, watch the players as they get into position outside the lane, or watch players check into the game for other players. For the love of St. Peter, just show the replay of the foul. There’s more than enough time to do it, and it’s not like we’d be missing real high octane action!

And when the replay is shown, I would like (just once) a commentator to wait until the replay is actually shown before telling us what the replay shows. Commentators always jump the gun on making their decision to support the ref’s call. As a replay is being shown, they will be saying how it was a good call, even though the replay clearly shows that it wasn’t! If they would just wait and watch the replay without pre-judgment that the ref was right, they would dramatically reduce their dumbassness.

#2 Too Many Time-Outs
Each team should have it’s qty of timeouts reduced by half (at least). Not only would this make close games more bearable to watch, but it would reward well-coached teams that actually prepare in advance for end-of-game situations.

#1 No Game Clock – Play to 80
Here’s what I propose:

· First team to reach 80 wins. You must win by 3.
· Automatic long TV timeouts would be scheduled for when the first team reaches 20, 40, 60 and 80 points…with the “40 point break” being equivalent to halftime.
· The shot clock still exists (30 seconds as mentioned above).
· Each team would still get a certain number of timeouts (probably 2 per team per half). Each timeout would be a long, TV timeout.
· If a team reaches 80 but has not won by 3, then (after the automatic TV timeout has taken effect) all remaining timeouts would be lost. Therefore, the 80+ action is completely timeout free.

For the most part, the game wouldn’t really be different. Teams are still equally motivated to play good offense, defense, shoot good shots, commit few turnovers, rebound, etc. The difference comes during end of game situations. This is how the end of games would be different:
1. No team is ever truly out of the game until it’s over. Teams would make furious comebacks, but rather than being fueled by the other team’s missed free-throws, comebacks must be fueled by furious defense.
2. The end of games would be fantastic. There are bound to be close games that end in back and forth epics of neither team being able to shake the other. If you’ve played ping pong before, you probably remember at least some games that went back and forth at the end.
3. No game would ever come down to who has the ball with less than 35 seconds left on the clock…which really just comes down to random, coincidental timing. This new system would be a much fairer and more entertaining.

Well, that’s it for my suggestions. And if you were curious…YES, my gripes do stem from bitterness of correctly picking only 2 of the Elite 8 and getting blanked on my Final 4 picks!

Re: Star Treatment and "Dumb Rules"

I have NEVER seen such a blatant display of star treatment as I did in the Tennessee – Ohio State sweet 16 match-up.

With about 2 minutes left in the game, Greg Oden got cut on his chin and blood started noticeably dripping onto his white jersey. The officials then stopped the action and forced him to the sideline, presumably to stop the bleeding and change his jersey.

What happens next blew me away: He stood in front of his bench for about 3 seconds, and proceeded to calmly walk back onto the court. The scorers table buzzed him in, and the officials didn’t say a word. He didn’t change his jersey nor stop the bleeding. In fact, during all remaining timeouts during the final 2 minutes (roughly 27 of them), he went straight to the trainers who continued to clean his wound in an attempt to stop the bleeding. New blood spots continued to appear throughout the game.

It is impossible to argue that the refs didn’t consciously ignore the rules to aid a star player in a big game. It’s one thing to not make a call during the final seconds of utter chaos…but this was a conscious decision made during a dead ball.

Maybe this is also a dumb rule, but the final 2 minutes of a sweet 16 game is NOT the time to make a stand against it.

Ironically, this year before the tourney, the officials announced that they would enforce the rules to the letter of the law…

Re: Best of the NBA

Agreed on the all-star commentating team.

While I have washed my hand since it’s glorious shaking of Sager’s, the moment will live forever in my heart – me telling him I’m his biggest fan, and him uttering “Jesus! How do these people find me!?”

Wouldn't Sager make the perfect Halloween costume! Easy, not too attention-grabbing, and absolutely hilarious to those who get it.

ISU All-Century Team

Iowa State University is providing the public the privelage of determining the best Cyclone basketball players of the past century. Go here to vote. Thanks to Sport for the tip (and he'd tell you to be sure to check Paul Shirley's name).


In other news, ISU is leading the ESPN School Spirit national poll. I consider it just acknowledgement to be one of the 22 schools available and am glad to see Hilton Coliseum recognized as one of the toughest arenas in college hoops.

You Can't Make This Stuff Up...

Minnesota High School wrestling is being put on hold after 24 wrestlers contracted a type of herpes. No, this isn't taken from The Onion sports page. Already regarded by some as being a bit too homosexual of a sport for their taste, this can't help but add fuel to the wise-cracking fire. Here at "Just A Bit Outside" we value the great sport of wrestling and agree there is absolutely nothing gay about a bunch of dudes giving each other herpes. How'd I guess the original carrier was a Corn Husker?

More NBA Crackdowns

In its quest to purify the league, NBA officials are considering instituting penalties for defensive "flops." Although I agree with it on principal because flopping is rather unprofessional and it pains me to see poor defense (and poor acting) rewarded when nothing illegal was done, I would rather see the referees focus more on the other kind of flop. I get much more aggravated watching guys pump fake their opponent into the air and then attemp to draw a foul in order to get to the free-throw line. I'm not talking about down low on the blocks, or if one player jumps into another, but rather when a player is about to shoot a perimeter shot and the defender jumps straight up into the air to the side of the shooter in an effort to contest the shot but would clearly avoid contact and the shooter knowingly leans into the defender to make it appear like a foul. It drives me crazy to see it rewarded with a whistle because the offender created the contact.

For instance, look at Sunday night's game between the Lakers and Spurs. It was a two-point game and Kobe Bryant took the desperation shot at the buzzer. Kobe, being a master at the crime detailed above, put up the jump-shot and on his way down flailed his arms uncontrollably, absolutely clocking Manu Ginobili right in the face. Kobe was suspended for one game because it is NBA policy that "striking a player above the shoulders is an automatic one-game suspension." Of course Kobe is outraged and the Tuesday night NBA Courtside crew can't believe it because "he didn't intend to hit him in the face." Noone refutes that because Manu isn't even in Kobe's line of sight, but he DID intend to recklessly swing his arms. I don't think it was malicious and I don't think he even planned on doing it. I honestly think it was out of habit. But don't take my word for it. I encourage you to view the play for yourself and tell me whether or not it was a natural movement. You will clearly see him unnaturally swing his arm after he realized the shot wasn't going to go in. And THAT's the problem with offensive flopping.

Futhermore, why punish defensive flopping? Just don't call it! Every time you see a play let go in which a player flops there is a guaranteed defensive breakdown along with an offensive player immediately wide open. I'd bet about 80% of non-called defensive flops result in points for the offense. An offensive flop does the opposite, it gives the culprit points (usually at the free-throw line).

The solution? Just swallow your whistle and let 'em play. On second thought, if you stopped calling all flops it would actually force them to play.

The Big XII-Pac 10 Challenge

Although long overdue, kudos for the Big XII and Pac 10 for finally getting this idea in motion. After annually keeping tabs on the Big Ten-ACC Challenge, I've thought for a long time the Big XII should consider approaching a conference to set up a similar matchup. I think it makes non-conference play more exciting and gives more opportunities for impressive wins on an NCAA Tournament resume. If anything, the Big Ten-ACC currently gets quite a bit of national exposure and it would be good for Big XII basketball. I also like the pick of hooking up with the Pac 10. The SEC might have been a bit more high profile, but this year the Pac 10 is arguably the best in basketball and I like the idea of one midwest conference taking on the east coast while the other midwest conference battles the west. Whereas the Big Ten has never beaten the ACC in the challenge, I think our two conferences are more evenly matched and it would be interesting. (This could also give us bragging rights over the Big Ten if we won our challenge.) Tune in next year.

The Mid-Winter Classic

I went online yesterday to see when NBA all-star voting ended (because I like to cast my ballot as close to the event as possible) and was shocked to see it already had days ago. I realize they need some preparation time, but an entire month in advance? A lot can happen in the span of a month. (Not to mention the ballots were opened three months in advance on Nov. 14th!)
Now, we've all expressed our disgust with ridiculous fan voting in the past, but I think this takes the cake: how the f *** could Shaquille O'Neal be starting?!?! As of the voting deadline, he had played in four games this season. Four. And he didn't even play well--his box score stats averaged per game:

14, 6.75, 1.25, 0.00, 1.00, 3.5 (pts, reb, ast, stl, blk, t.o.'s)

He could have played like that all year long and isn't near all-star worthy, let alone starting. Four f'ing games. I don't believe it.

On the other hand, it was great to see both Chris Bosh and Gilbert Arenas selected by the fans. I voted for Bosh last year because I think he is truly one of the most underrated guys in the league. Get some talent around him in Toronto and they will be on the rise. As for Gilbert, he's putting up ridiculous point totals while coming through in the clutch. The Wiz have the best record in the East and it's all owed to Agent 0.

In the West it is hard to see an all-star five-man team without Dirk or Steve Nash, let alone without both. The conference is so forward heavy, I could see Dirk getting barely edged out, but Nash should be in ahead of Tracy McGrady. The Suns have the best record in the league and Nash is playing towards a third consecutive MVP, whereas McGrady is putting up his usual big numbers but this season has been more successful because Yao has elevated his game. Between Duncan, Garnett, and Dirk, who do you leave out? I'd have to go with Duncan because he really hasn't been as dominant this year. Tough call, though.

Well, my ballot might not have been allowed to cancel out one injustice submitted by Mr. Fan-of-Big-Names, but here it is anyways.

Eastern Conference:

PG: Gilbert Arenas: solid scorer with much to prove.

SG: Dwayne Wade: Sub-.500 record, but he's about all they got right now.

SF: LeBron James: like Wade, not a lot of help, but team still thriving.

PF: Chris Bosh: a poor man's Kevin Garnett.

C: Dwight Howard: boards like an animal and has young Magic in playoffs.

Western Conference

PG: Steve Nash: and to think the Suns almost didn't sign him because of his age.

SG: Kobe Bryant: noone expected the Baby Lakers to look this good and he can still take over games by himself.

SF: Dirk Nowitzki: would have recieved my vote for MVP last year and, as of now, would get it this year.

PF: Kevin Garnett: leading the league in rebounds for the fourth year in a row.

C: Marcus Camby: with absence of Ben Wallace, time to reward hardnosed defense.

*Reserves will come at a later date...

Non-Coast Bias

Throughout the entire college football season you hear the California sportswriters praise USC. Throughout the entire baseball season you hear the northeasterners speculate about the nations love of the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry. Everyone knows both West Coast and East Coast biases exist, but while they are preoccupied battling eachother, the Midwest has flown in under the radar and proven its stake as a dominant player in the sporting world.
I was prompted to write this post after seeing time and time again Around The Horn contestant Jay Mariotti harrassed every time he brings up his city of Chicago, the most recent being a reference to Michael Jordan. Yet Bill Plaschke and J.A. Adante voice their love of USC and think the NBA revolves around the Lakers, Bob Ryan considers Boston the hotspot of sports, and Tim Cowlishaw claims loyalty to about any team south of the 40-degree lattitude line-- all usually going without criticism of regional favoritism. Any mention of Chicago and the other writers let out groans as Reali often mutes Jay. I think he has the right to claim some midwest superiority; let's evaluate:

-The current Superbowl matchup is between Chicago and Indianapolis. People wrote off Peyton because he isn't clutch. People wrote off the Bears because they had no offense. ESPN is wondering if Rex Grossman is the worst quarterback in Superbowl history. Yet, both teams just keep on winning.

-Five of the last six World Series participants were from the two Central Divisions with the past two winners (White Sox and Cardinals) coming from the heart of the midwest. Like the Bears, St. Louis was given the least chance to win it all and were supposed to get swept by the mighty Mets. The ChiSox went 11-1 in the postseason--that's dominance.

-As of today, four of the six teams in the Eastern Conference with winning records are in the Central Division. (And this is after Milwaukee hit a losing streak after its two best players were injured.) The Bulls, Pistons, and Cavs are expected to make title runs in June. I think the east coast's representation in the NBA might be the most pitiful in sports.

-The Missouri Valley Conference is quickly becoming regarded as the seventh "major" conference in NCAA basketball.

Now, I'm not saying the Midwest is the greatest region in sports, nor am I saying it will stay like this. All I'm saying is it would be nice to see a little recognition for its recent accomplishments. I enjoy seeing our teams represent well, especially with the Big Ten and Big XII down this year. However, the east coast still owns the NCAA Tourney (last six champs) and the West is still the power conference in the NBA, but at least the little guys from the land-locked "heart" of the country still have a surprise or two. Go ahead, Jay, let 'em boo you and fight over ownership of the free world...we'll just keep on winning.

Boo-Yah! Stuart, You Suck!

Lately I've been watching Stump the Schwab, the sports-based trivia game show, on a regular basis. It is a very educational show with some amazing displays of knowledge. However, it gets tougher to watch almost daily due to Stuart Scott and his horrible hosting job. He makes horrible jokes, feeds Schwabs ego to ridiculous proportions, and tries his damnest to act/talk black. Any one who reads ESPN.com regularly can tell you that Scoop Jackson plays the role of the "token angry black guy" who thinks everything is a racial issue, and I'm wondering why he hasn't gone up to Stuart and bitchslapped him and told him to knock that shit off. It sounds completely unnatural and downright embarrassing. He's also tried to patent the expression "boo-yah!" and exploding fist bump. (Yesterday during the second round, after a contestant scored, Stuart tried to be a comedic smart ass by asking him if he could add 4 and 11 together, and his sarcastic response was, "I went to college, Stu." Then, I guess because Stu thought the guy was trying to upstage him, said, in all seriousness, "So did I, except I make a paycheck with lots and lots of zeroes on it", making for possibly the most unwarranted and awkward game show moment I've ever seen.) Searching on the internet for "Stump the Schwab" resulted in an amazing number of blogs and websites really laying into him, so I know I'm not the only one. The game show aside, he says the same shit during Sportscenter and I don't know how he's lasted this long. If ESPN gets rid of excellent baseball analyst Harold Reynolds for a minor sexual harrassment accusation, surely they should drop Stuart on grounds he's a dumbass.

Star Treatment and "Dumb Rules"

I was disappointed last night when NBA on TNT featured Charles Barkley alongside Marv Albert as the colorman tagteam for the riveting Kings-Lakers game. I usually listen to what Charles has to say, as he sometimes gives a unique perspective and isn't afraid to say it as it is, but last night I got a bit fed up. In the past I've heard him complain about referees holding every player to the same standards because he is a true believer of giving superstars preferential treatment (just like he received during his playing days). The play in question:

The Kings go up by four after a big fourth quarter rally of good defense and solid pick-and-rolls. After the Lakers hit a quick three, Sacto tries to inbound the ball, specifically to Kevin Martin who is a 91% free-throw shooter this season. Kobe knows this, so to prevent Martin from getting the ball he wraps him up from behind with both arms blatently across his chest and holds him back. Dick Bavetta calls a dead ball foul which results in one free-throw plus the ball.

Of course this sends Kobe into a frenzy, but it was Barkley who just couldn't believe that foul was called. He went on about how out of line Bavetta was for calling a dead ball foul, especially on Mr. Kobe Bryant. After literally a couple minutes of Barkley complaining that the refs should have let the play go and then just call an ordinary two-shot foul like LA wanted and how it reminded him of college basketball when he hates seeing refs call an intentional foul, Marv finally had enough and said, "But Charles, isn't that the rule?" His response? "Yeah, it's a rule, but a dumb rule. Sports are full of rules that shouldn't be followed and that's one they shouldn't have called." I laughed at Marv's next sarcastic question: "Is that what you're doing tonight, rewriting the rules?"

I should note that this all comes shortly after Ron Artest fouled out of the game for grabbing Kobe's jersey and holding him back to prevent him from getting the ball. Charles comments, "Yeah, it's a foul. But that's tough to foul out Ron Artest with that call." Frankly, I don't care what name's on your jersey, and it's good to see the refs don't either.

(Rather than a new post, I'll take this time to express how absurd it is the new "stricter" technical foul policy just doesn't apply to Kobe Bryant. Yes, both Duncan and Nowitzki complain an awful lot and get away with it, but not as much as Kobe. It's almost comical how much he whines to the refs. In fact, last night with the Lakers down by two towards the end of regulation, he tried some out of control spin move (in which I don't think he ever even saw the basket) right into two defenders who just stood their ground, expecting the whistle, and when it didn't come he turned to the officials with his arms outstretched and started yelling, even though the ball was still very much in play and his team was still hustling after it. This happens all the time, whenever he misses a contested shot, gets stripped of the ball, or gets called for a hand-check. Again, am I biased? Yes. Does that mean I'm wrong? No.)

UPDATE: The Onion on Kobe.

Bowl Predictions

BCS disputes aside, I'm pretty excited for this year's bowl season. There are some good traditional matchups, as well as lopsided games that should result in upsets. Even though the entire nation is saddened by the absence of Iowa State, the Big XII is still represented well. After winning the 2005 Bowl Challenge without much fanfare, the Big XII can potentially repeat, while the Big Ten may be looking at another losing record. Here are my personal predictions:

*Biggest upset: Nebraska over Auburn
*Toughest call: Wisconsin vs. Arkansas


Poinsetta
TCU over Northern Illinois

Las Vegas
Oregon over BYU

New Orleans
Rice over Troy

Papajohns.com
South Florida over East Carolina

New Mexico
New Mexico over San Jose State

Armed Forces
Tulsa over Utah

Hawaii
Hawaii over Arizona State

Motor City
Central Michigan over Middle Tennessee

Emerald
Florida State over UCLA

Independence
Oklahoma State over Alabama

Holiday
California over Texas A&M

Texas
Rutgers over Kansas State

Music City
Clemson over Kentucky

Brut Sun
Missouri over Oregon State

Liberty
South Carolina over Houston

Insight
Texas Tech over Minnesota

Champs Sports
Maryland over Purdue

Meineke Car Care
Boston College over Navy

Alamo
Texas over Iowa

Chick-fil-A
Virginia Tech over Georgia

MPC Computers
Nevada over Miami

Outback
Penn State over Tennessee

Cotton
Nebraska over Auburn

Gator
West Virginia over Georgia Tech

Capital One
Wisconsin over Arkansas

Rose
Michigan over USC

Fiesta
Oklahoma over Boise State

Orange
Wake Forest over Louisville

Sugar
LSU over Notre Dame

International
Cincinnati over Western Michigan

GMAC
Southern Miss over Ohio

BCS Championship
Florida over Ohio State


And the conference standings:

ACC: 6-2
Big XII: 6-2
Big East: 4-1
Big Ten: 3-4
Pac 10: 2-4
SEC: 4-5

Best of the NBA

The all-star tandem of Marv Albert, Steve Kerr, and Craig Sager have to be the best in sports. A great mix of knowledge, humor, and style, their commentary is a welcome relief from dumbasses Bill Walton and Snapper Jones. Seth shook Sager's hand at a Timberwolves game four years ago and I bet he still hasn't washed it.

A Frustrated Sunday

Alright, Chicago defense, you now have permission to snap. Tonight was After forcing five takeaways and holding New England to 17 points, including a recovered fumble on the final drive to deny the Patriots a score only to have Rex throw an interception on their first offensive play, you may let out the rage on Grossman (who had all four turnovers himself). You could see it in their eyes--the defense can't take it much longer...

You've Got To Be Kidding Me...

During a time when Major League Baseball is trying to escape the steroid era and get back to what baseball should be, the experts reward a power hitter with the MVP. Despite the black eye baseball has endured the past five years, I guess people are still awed by the longball, and I find it almost comical that two descriptors clarifying why Howard won were:

Ryan Howard of the Philadelphia Phillies was voted the National League's Most Valuable Player on Monday after leading the majors in home runs and RBI.

He had the most homers in the major leagues since Barry Bonds hit a record 73 in 2001.

Is it a good thing to be compared to Barroid Bonds? As I already analyzed, Albert Pujols was probably more deserving. This is the third time Pujols has finished second in the MVP vote, the first two times to Bonds. How many times this season did I hear an ESPN analyst claim Albert Pujols is "the best player in the game" (and more often, "best hitter in the game") only to then declare his support for Howard because of his particularly great season. Shouldn't "the best" usually win this award?

Stacking the two up next to each other yields these certainties:

-Howard's lead in home runs and runs-batted-in outweighed Pujols' higher finish in batting average, on-base percentage, slugging percentage, runs, and stolen bases.

-It went without much recognition that Howard finished second in the league in strikeouts with an incredible 181 whiffs. (Albert was 131st with 50 K's.)

-The often used argument of team success translating to player value did not come into play as the Cardinals made the playoffs with Rolen, Edmonds, and Eckstein fighting/sidelined by injuries. The Phillies failed to make the postseason.

-Defense isn't nearly as important as offense. Howard finished second in number of errors by all major league firstbasemen. Pujols won his first career Gold Glove Award.

Is it sour grapes? Yes. Am I still right? Yes.

UPDATE: Apparently this guy agrees with me completely. Wow, the numbers are very telling. It's not even really close; one of Howard's two statistical edges resulted in many more RBI opportunities, not clutch hitting.

NFL Surprises

1) As usual, I spent Sunday at my neighbor's place watching NFL games. He has two tvs side-by-side (a 42" plasma and a 17" LCD inside his fireplace) and the two midday games on air featured Houston and Seattle. My friends didn't understand why I was proud to sit there and watch both Seneca Wallace and Sage Rosenfels behind center on their respective teams. Sure, they might not have won, but they still represented ISU well.

2) On the flip side, it was horrible to sit there and watch Dallas beat Indy. Most Texans cheer excessively when Dallas makes a good play while losing, jump up and down and hollar the Cowboys' greatness when beating a lesser team, and will absolutely not let up when they knock of the lone undefeated, and nearly invincible, Colts. Although I had a hunch Indy would take a fall this week, due to recent subpar play, I still thought they were better than this. One thing's for sure: it's not Peyton's fault. Well, for the most part. He did overthrow recievers, particularly towards the end of the game when it would have made the difference, but the way he controls his team is unmatched. How many times did he approach the line and point out the blitz and bark commands regarding oncoming defensive formations only to have the offensive line let him down? Credit the Cowboys with fired up defense, but Peyton should have had more protection. The fact the Colts have won all their games by an average of less than a touchdown could be a bit worrisome, but I think P. Manning has replaced Tom Brady and an aging Brett Favre as the smart and talented quarterback to watch in the NFL; this just might be the Colts' year.

As for Dallas, I wished this season they had to play the Bears...

3) ...who are possibly a more all-around football team than people think. I still hear comments about how Chicago is one-dimensional with great defense and could be a better team if they got a 'real' quarterback. What these people don't know is that in addition to the #1 defense in the league, they are currently second in the league in points per game on offense. Grossman is third in the league in touchdowns (behind two guys named Manning and Brady) and happens to be first in TD %. The comeback against Arizona was an anomoly and Rex will be consistently reliable in time for the playoffs. But what really makes Chicago complete is their special teams. They lead the league in punt returns, kicking points, and last week had a record 108-yard missed field goal TD return for the second straight season. Robbie Gould is the hottest kicker in football right now having just broke the franchise record with 27 straight made field goals. He is the only kicker who hasn't missed (aside from Gramatica who is one for one on FG) with an amazing 10/10 on 40-yarders. Let's just hope they can keep this momentum going into the postseason and the Bears will be tough to beat.

4 News In Brief

A few of my recent favorite pieces from The Onion Sports--all brutally true and hilarious. Honestly, who comes up with this stuff?


John Madden Reminds Viewers Of Importance Of Quarterback To NFL Teams
DENVER—Color commentator John Madden spent the third quarter of the San Diego Chargers-Denver Broncos game explaining exactly how important it is for an NFL team to have a quarterback. "You're definitely gonna need one of these guys on your team if you want to have any success in the NFL," Madden said, explaining how having somebody standing directly behind the center when the ball is snapped provides a feeling of stability and consistency. "If Denver, for example, didn't have a quarterback, they could maybe hand the ball off to the running back, but there's absolutely no way the Broncos could pass the ball to the receivers. Frankly, I don't know how the Raiders do it." Madden later went on to talk about how different football would be if there were no end zone and the field "just went on and on forever."


Lou Piniella's First Big Move As Cubs Manager Is To Resign

CHICAGO—During his formal introduction as Cubs manager Tuesday, Lou Piniella announced that his first and only managerial decision will be to step down immediately and permanently from his new position—a bold, unexpected move that he successfully carried out just moments later. "My time in Chicago has been great, and it feels like it was just yesterday that I started this job, but I truly believe that this move will give me a better opportunity to win," Piniella said at the press conference while ceremoniously removing a Cubs hat and jersey. "I'm very excited about leaving this team." After the announcement, Cubs GM Jim Hendry praised Piniella's sound judgment and pure baseball instinct, saying that "his ability to make quick, smart decisions like this one is exactly why we hired him."


Hideki Matsui Unable To Grasp Translator's Explanation Of Where Cory Lidle Is

NEW YORK—Hideki Matsui's interpreter Roger Kahlon has been unable explain to the Yankees' Japanese-speaking left fielder that former teammate Cory Lidle died instantaneously last Wednesday after flying his four-seat, SR20 aircraft into a high-rise apartment building in Manhattan's Upper East Side. "At this point, I'm pretty sure [Matsui] thinks Lidle is either in his four-bedroom apartment or on a 20-minute plane ride to upstate New York," Kahlon said, adding that in order to make Lidle's whereabouts clear to Matsui, he has even resorted to making one of his hands into a plane, the other into a building, crashing them together, and making explosion noises. "This kind of thing just doesn't translate very well." According to Kahlon, the last time he asked Matsui where Cory Lidle was, a confused Matsui answered, "The bullpen."


Larry Coker Fights For His Job By Swinging Helmet At Athletic Director, Chancellor

CORAL GABLES, FL—University of Miami head football coach Larry Coker, afraid of being scapegoated and fired in the wake of Saturday's brawl involving Hurricanes players and those from Florida International University, defended himself by suspending 13 players, taking full responsibility for disciplining his team, and swinging a Hurricanes football helmet at the heads of athletic director Paul Dee and chancellor Donna Shalala during a press conference Wednesday. "What happened was unfortunate and does not reflect our character as a team or my philosophy as a coach," said Coker, grasping the helmet by the faceguard and delivering repeated blows to Shalala's face and neck. "However, I believe that dismissing me at this time would in fact send the wrong message about discipline to our players and the wrong message about the University of Miami to the public." Dee was physically unable to comment or breathe after the press conference, but Shalala seemed to indicate that she would handle the matter internally as soon as she stopped bleeding internally.

Re: More Bang For Your Buck

Cale Kassel said: I'd be very interested to see what these number are at the end of the season and see what, if anything changes...

Per request, here are the final standings regarding regular season wins per million dollars paid in team salaries. More teams changed position than expected. Even though it wasn't quite the all-star break when the first numbers were posted, it is still a good representation of how the teams performed in the second half of the season.

*Take note of the AL Central: two of the largest gainers were the Twins and Royals while the two biggest drops were the Tigers and White Sox.

2006 World Series Champions!

I would like to announce my triumphant return to blogging. Triumphant, of course, because I am still celebrating the Cinderella-story World Series victory by my St. Louis Cardinals. Or am I already celebrating next year’s repeat? Or am I getting a little ahead of myself…
Regardless, no one outside of Redbird Nation expected them to win (or even get into the playoffs, for that matter) and they epitomized the mentality that once you make the post-season the regular season *doesn’t matter*. It wasn’t a juggernaut lineup or potent starting rotation or dazzling defense—it was timely hitting and timely pitching. Suppan, Rolen, Weaver, Taguchi, Wainright, and last, but certainly not least, Little David Eckstein all stepped up in a huge way at the right times. Then combine that with LaRussa pulling the right strings from the foxhole.
I do realize that by now any one of our few readers must be sick and tired of my plugs for St. Louis and right now you must be rolling your eyes (if you’ve even read this far), but I tell you, it is a tremendous feeling when your team finally wins it all. I became a Bulls fan at the height of their success, amid the Jordan era while winning championships, and it almost became expected and certainly less thrilling. But if you’ve been waiting your entire life for your team to get to the top, especially after fear they may have missed their chance two years earlier and came into this October huge underdogs, it is so much sweeter. Cale, you know what I'm talking about. (I will admit their drought hasn’t been my entire life, as their last WS title was in 1982—twenty-three days after I was born. I also looked up the date of my birth and it happened to be the very day St. Louis won its very first division title. You see, being a Cardinal was my destiny.)
Anyways, I will cease gloating and just sit here with the permanent grin that will last me through the off-season. Come April we get to do it all over again, with new heroes and new villains and new underdogs, and I can’t wait. Maybe next year we’ll get that White Sox-Cardinals October matchup. Maybe it’ll be the Cubs. Riiight. Either way, baseball truly is a sport unlike any other.


UPDATE: I think The Onion speaks on behalf of all non-Cardinal fans.