Legally Speaking, Duke Football Sucks

Duke and Louisville agreed to a four-game football schedule contract in 2002. The agreement said that if Duke backed out they would be fined $150,000 per game if Louisville could not find a replacement team "of similar stature." Louisville sued Duke after Duke bailed on the contract following their 40-3 loss in 2002. The Duke lawyers argued that since Duke is so terrible, literally any team would work as a replacement and the judge agreed:

At oral argument, Duke (with a candor perhaps more attributable to good legal strategy than to institutional modesty) persuasively asserted that this is a threshold that could not be any lower. Duke's argument on this point cannot be reasonably disputed by Louisville.

Ouch.