You Can't Make This Stuff Up...

Minnesota High School wrestling is being put on hold after 24 wrestlers contracted a type of herpes. No, this isn't taken from The Onion sports page. Already regarded by some as being a bit too homosexual of a sport for their taste, this can't help but add fuel to the wise-cracking fire. Here at "Just A Bit Outside" we value the great sport of wrestling and agree there is absolutely nothing gay about a bunch of dudes giving each other herpes. How'd I guess the original carrier was a Corn Husker?

More NBA Crackdowns

In its quest to purify the league, NBA officials are considering instituting penalties for defensive "flops." Although I agree with it on principal because flopping is rather unprofessional and it pains me to see poor defense (and poor acting) rewarded when nothing illegal was done, I would rather see the referees focus more on the other kind of flop. I get much more aggravated watching guys pump fake their opponent into the air and then attemp to draw a foul in order to get to the free-throw line. I'm not talking about down low on the blocks, or if one player jumps into another, but rather when a player is about to shoot a perimeter shot and the defender jumps straight up into the air to the side of the shooter in an effort to contest the shot but would clearly avoid contact and the shooter knowingly leans into the defender to make it appear like a foul. It drives me crazy to see it rewarded with a whistle because the offender created the contact.

For instance, look at Sunday night's game between the Lakers and Spurs. It was a two-point game and Kobe Bryant took the desperation shot at the buzzer. Kobe, being a master at the crime detailed above, put up the jump-shot and on his way down flailed his arms uncontrollably, absolutely clocking Manu Ginobili right in the face. Kobe was suspended for one game because it is NBA policy that "striking a player above the shoulders is an automatic one-game suspension." Of course Kobe is outraged and the Tuesday night NBA Courtside crew can't believe it because "he didn't intend to hit him in the face." Noone refutes that because Manu isn't even in Kobe's line of sight, but he DID intend to recklessly swing his arms. I don't think it was malicious and I don't think he even planned on doing it. I honestly think it was out of habit. But don't take my word for it. I encourage you to view the play for yourself and tell me whether or not it was a natural movement. You will clearly see him unnaturally swing his arm after he realized the shot wasn't going to go in. And THAT's the problem with offensive flopping.

Futhermore, why punish defensive flopping? Just don't call it! Every time you see a play let go in which a player flops there is a guaranteed defensive breakdown along with an offensive player immediately wide open. I'd bet about 80% of non-called defensive flops result in points for the offense. An offensive flop does the opposite, it gives the culprit points (usually at the free-throw line).

The solution? Just swallow your whistle and let 'em play. On second thought, if you stopped calling all flops it would actually force them to play.

The Big XII-Pac 10 Challenge

Although long overdue, kudos for the Big XII and Pac 10 for finally getting this idea in motion. After annually keeping tabs on the Big Ten-ACC Challenge, I've thought for a long time the Big XII should consider approaching a conference to set up a similar matchup. I think it makes non-conference play more exciting and gives more opportunities for impressive wins on an NCAA Tournament resume. If anything, the Big Ten-ACC currently gets quite a bit of national exposure and it would be good for Big XII basketball. I also like the pick of hooking up with the Pac 10. The SEC might have been a bit more high profile, but this year the Pac 10 is arguably the best in basketball and I like the idea of one midwest conference taking on the east coast while the other midwest conference battles the west. Whereas the Big Ten has never beaten the ACC in the challenge, I think our two conferences are more evenly matched and it would be interesting. (This could also give us bragging rights over the Big Ten if we won our challenge.) Tune in next year.

The Mid-Winter Classic

I went online yesterday to see when NBA all-star voting ended (because I like to cast my ballot as close to the event as possible) and was shocked to see it already had days ago. I realize they need some preparation time, but an entire month in advance? A lot can happen in the span of a month. (Not to mention the ballots were opened three months in advance on Nov. 14th!)
Now, we've all expressed our disgust with ridiculous fan voting in the past, but I think this takes the cake: how the f *** could Shaquille O'Neal be starting?!?! As of the voting deadline, he had played in four games this season. Four. And he didn't even play well--his box score stats averaged per game:

14, 6.75, 1.25, 0.00, 1.00, 3.5 (pts, reb, ast, stl, blk, t.o.'s)

He could have played like that all year long and isn't near all-star worthy, let alone starting. Four f'ing games. I don't believe it.

On the other hand, it was great to see both Chris Bosh and Gilbert Arenas selected by the fans. I voted for Bosh last year because I think he is truly one of the most underrated guys in the league. Get some talent around him in Toronto and they will be on the rise. As for Gilbert, he's putting up ridiculous point totals while coming through in the clutch. The Wiz have the best record in the East and it's all owed to Agent 0.

In the West it is hard to see an all-star five-man team without Dirk or Steve Nash, let alone without both. The conference is so forward heavy, I could see Dirk getting barely edged out, but Nash should be in ahead of Tracy McGrady. The Suns have the best record in the league and Nash is playing towards a third consecutive MVP, whereas McGrady is putting up his usual big numbers but this season has been more successful because Yao has elevated his game. Between Duncan, Garnett, and Dirk, who do you leave out? I'd have to go with Duncan because he really hasn't been as dominant this year. Tough call, though.

Well, my ballot might not have been allowed to cancel out one injustice submitted by Mr. Fan-of-Big-Names, but here it is anyways.

Eastern Conference:

PG: Gilbert Arenas: solid scorer with much to prove.

SG: Dwayne Wade: Sub-.500 record, but he's about all they got right now.

SF: LeBron James: like Wade, not a lot of help, but team still thriving.

PF: Chris Bosh: a poor man's Kevin Garnett.

C: Dwight Howard: boards like an animal and has young Magic in playoffs.

Western Conference

PG: Steve Nash: and to think the Suns almost didn't sign him because of his age.

SG: Kobe Bryant: noone expected the Baby Lakers to look this good and he can still take over games by himself.

SF: Dirk Nowitzki: would have recieved my vote for MVP last year and, as of now, would get it this year.

PF: Kevin Garnett: leading the league in rebounds for the fourth year in a row.

C: Marcus Camby: with absence of Ben Wallace, time to reward hardnosed defense.

*Reserves will come at a later date...

Non-Coast Bias

Throughout the entire college football season you hear the California sportswriters praise USC. Throughout the entire baseball season you hear the northeasterners speculate about the nations love of the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry. Everyone knows both West Coast and East Coast biases exist, but while they are preoccupied battling eachother, the Midwest has flown in under the radar and proven its stake as a dominant player in the sporting world.
I was prompted to write this post after seeing time and time again Around The Horn contestant Jay Mariotti harrassed every time he brings up his city of Chicago, the most recent being a reference to Michael Jordan. Yet Bill Plaschke and J.A. Adante voice their love of USC and think the NBA revolves around the Lakers, Bob Ryan considers Boston the hotspot of sports, and Tim Cowlishaw claims loyalty to about any team south of the 40-degree lattitude line-- all usually going without criticism of regional favoritism. Any mention of Chicago and the other writers let out groans as Reali often mutes Jay. I think he has the right to claim some midwest superiority; let's evaluate:

-The current Superbowl matchup is between Chicago and Indianapolis. People wrote off Peyton because he isn't clutch. People wrote off the Bears because they had no offense. ESPN is wondering if Rex Grossman is the worst quarterback in Superbowl history. Yet, both teams just keep on winning.

-Five of the last six World Series participants were from the two Central Divisions with the past two winners (White Sox and Cardinals) coming from the heart of the midwest. Like the Bears, St. Louis was given the least chance to win it all and were supposed to get swept by the mighty Mets. The ChiSox went 11-1 in the postseason--that's dominance.

-As of today, four of the six teams in the Eastern Conference with winning records are in the Central Division. (And this is after Milwaukee hit a losing streak after its two best players were injured.) The Bulls, Pistons, and Cavs are expected to make title runs in June. I think the east coast's representation in the NBA might be the most pitiful in sports.

-The Missouri Valley Conference is quickly becoming regarded as the seventh "major" conference in NCAA basketball.

Now, I'm not saying the Midwest is the greatest region in sports, nor am I saying it will stay like this. All I'm saying is it would be nice to see a little recognition for its recent accomplishments. I enjoy seeing our teams represent well, especially with the Big Ten and Big XII down this year. However, the east coast still owns the NCAA Tourney (last six champs) and the West is still the power conference in the NBA, but at least the little guys from the land-locked "heart" of the country still have a surprise or two. Go ahead, Jay, let 'em boo you and fight over ownership of the free world...we'll just keep on winning.

Boo-Yah! Stuart, You Suck!

Lately I've been watching Stump the Schwab, the sports-based trivia game show, on a regular basis. It is a very educational show with some amazing displays of knowledge. However, it gets tougher to watch almost daily due to Stuart Scott and his horrible hosting job. He makes horrible jokes, feeds Schwabs ego to ridiculous proportions, and tries his damnest to act/talk black. Any one who reads ESPN.com regularly can tell you that Scoop Jackson plays the role of the "token angry black guy" who thinks everything is a racial issue, and I'm wondering why he hasn't gone up to Stuart and bitchslapped him and told him to knock that shit off. It sounds completely unnatural and downright embarrassing. He's also tried to patent the expression "boo-yah!" and exploding fist bump. (Yesterday during the second round, after a contestant scored, Stuart tried to be a comedic smart ass by asking him if he could add 4 and 11 together, and his sarcastic response was, "I went to college, Stu." Then, I guess because Stu thought the guy was trying to upstage him, said, in all seriousness, "So did I, except I make a paycheck with lots and lots of zeroes on it", making for possibly the most unwarranted and awkward game show moment I've ever seen.) Searching on the internet for "Stump the Schwab" resulted in an amazing number of blogs and websites really laying into him, so I know I'm not the only one. The game show aside, he says the same shit during Sportscenter and I don't know how he's lasted this long. If ESPN gets rid of excellent baseball analyst Harold Reynolds for a minor sexual harrassment accusation, surely they should drop Stuart on grounds he's a dumbass.

Star Treatment and "Dumb Rules"

I was disappointed last night when NBA on TNT featured Charles Barkley alongside Marv Albert as the colorman tagteam for the riveting Kings-Lakers game. I usually listen to what Charles has to say, as he sometimes gives a unique perspective and isn't afraid to say it as it is, but last night I got a bit fed up. In the past I've heard him complain about referees holding every player to the same standards because he is a true believer of giving superstars preferential treatment (just like he received during his playing days). The play in question:

The Kings go up by four after a big fourth quarter rally of good defense and solid pick-and-rolls. After the Lakers hit a quick three, Sacto tries to inbound the ball, specifically to Kevin Martin who is a 91% free-throw shooter this season. Kobe knows this, so to prevent Martin from getting the ball he wraps him up from behind with both arms blatently across his chest and holds him back. Dick Bavetta calls a dead ball foul which results in one free-throw plus the ball.

Of course this sends Kobe into a frenzy, but it was Barkley who just couldn't believe that foul was called. He went on about how out of line Bavetta was for calling a dead ball foul, especially on Mr. Kobe Bryant. After literally a couple minutes of Barkley complaining that the refs should have let the play go and then just call an ordinary two-shot foul like LA wanted and how it reminded him of college basketball when he hates seeing refs call an intentional foul, Marv finally had enough and said, "But Charles, isn't that the rule?" His response? "Yeah, it's a rule, but a dumb rule. Sports are full of rules that shouldn't be followed and that's one they shouldn't have called." I laughed at Marv's next sarcastic question: "Is that what you're doing tonight, rewriting the rules?"

I should note that this all comes shortly after Ron Artest fouled out of the game for grabbing Kobe's jersey and holding him back to prevent him from getting the ball. Charles comments, "Yeah, it's a foul. But that's tough to foul out Ron Artest with that call." Frankly, I don't care what name's on your jersey, and it's good to see the refs don't either.

(Rather than a new post, I'll take this time to express how absurd it is the new "stricter" technical foul policy just doesn't apply to Kobe Bryant. Yes, both Duncan and Nowitzki complain an awful lot and get away with it, but not as much as Kobe. It's almost comical how much he whines to the refs. In fact, last night with the Lakers down by two towards the end of regulation, he tried some out of control spin move (in which I don't think he ever even saw the basket) right into two defenders who just stood their ground, expecting the whistle, and when it didn't come he turned to the officials with his arms outstretched and started yelling, even though the ball was still very much in play and his team was still hustling after it. This happens all the time, whenever he misses a contested shot, gets stripped of the ball, or gets called for a hand-check. Again, am I biased? Yes. Does that mean I'm wrong? No.)

UPDATE: The Onion on Kobe.